I still hate Techies

<Rant>

I hated techies when they first appeared, and I hate them even more now. It's well past 1st April, the joke's over Valve, it's time for them to go.

Oh but Sando, you've got to be sooo clever and skillful to play them, and they're really funny! Look at the little Goblins!

Clever = put your mines in a slightly different place from other techies and hope somebody walks on them.

Skillful = Press E to explode when next to an enemy hero.

Funny = for the team who they're on with.

Not entertaining at all = for the team who can insta-die by happening to walk somewhere on the map that they haven't already checked with sentry wards.

Super-techies = realise that Statis Trap has a 50% longer stun time than Black Hole and the same AOE. With a 10 second CD. (it's ok though, nobody ever actually seems to use them)

Seriously, I'm sick of this bull-sh*t, sure you can beat them fairly easily with either the right heroes or a Gem...but the game will be slow and ****py, even when you've won I can hardly be bothered celebrated. Every time I see them picked, I just want to abandon on the spot, they drain that much good humour from my soul.

They break some of the core tenants of dota -

1) You don't insta-kill heroes without serious, SERIOUS, amounts of farm.

2) You have to have at least some peripheral involvement, be somewhere near or at least use some skills or attacks in order to kill somebody.

3) This is DOTA, a strategic action game, not mine sweeper where the flags cost 200 gold a pop. Or, oops you happened to walk in the wrong place, silly you, boom!

4) You use skill to achieve anything. The first person to say "oh but playing techies is really skillful" will be taken out the back and shot in the head. Wandering round pressing Q when nobody is there is not a skill, even if you do it without looking at the keyboard. Pressing E when you stand next to an enemy hero is not skill, it's a simple mechanical operation you could teach a monkey to do.

5) When you get killed by an enemy you want to look at it and go "Well played, sir, fine move". You out-thought or out-skilled or out-coordinated me. Sometimes people are just really farmed and brute force it, you think "fair enough, you've worked for that". Compare with randomly blowing up.

And no, there's is absolutely nothing you can do to change my mind. Get this filth out of my game!!!

My current plans are:

1) Report everyone who picks Techies.
2) Play "anti-techies" whenever they're picked. Something ranged with cheap minions maybe. Maybe something really tanky with Blade Mail and a Fast Gem - oh wait, that doesn't work either. Focus 100% on making their game as miserable as they're making mine. A one man crusade against sh*tty heroes.

</rant>

Amazing.

Techies is a pretty **** hero.Just pick Zeus and Crystal Maiden (cuz of aura and ward *****ing)

...

OK, then. Can't believe I read all of that.

You forgot to vote guys :)

^^ I did.

I agree Techies are one of the most boring Heroes, whether they're in your team or in the enemy's, but I found out that 90% of the time I play against them I win. So, the annoying sensation I feel when the enemies pick Techies is balanced by my victory.

By the way, I find Necronomicon holders extremely good versus them for two reasons: Necro minions have true sight and can be used to detonate bombs from a distance, and you usually activate them when pushing, i.e. under the enemy towers where Techies have most likely placed their bombs.

I don't mind Techies because I rarely see them, but I feel like they're more of a joke and make every game a troll one.

Techies is far from being the most cancer hero in the game, trust me :)

I mean the pre-nerf Tinker or Faceless Void, the current Storm Spirit or Slark, still good old Lycan...that's the real cancer of doto. Add to this some heroes that I truly consider to be broken like Timbersaw with his double damage Aghs... That's the kind of hero where my reaction is "I'm just going to pick Doom and Doom them every time because f*** these heroes".

I already have my set of heroes that I hate with a burning passion and seriously Techies is far from there, yes I'd rather him not be in this game but the only moments where I have a problem with this hero is when he's in my team.

Beyond all the usual stuff like buy gem and necrobooks here's my personal picking advice against Techies : pick greedy. You can get away with the greediest lineup possible against this hero. First because he's always going solo offlane and he has no lane presence there (if he's support he has zero game impact and if he's mid you have won anyways), and second because he's very good at counterpushing so the game tends to always go late against him, however you are playing 5 vs 4 in return. Play solo safe lane Spectre, play solo support Omniknight, play jungle Doom...you get the idea. There's no way you can get punished for this kind of stuff with a Techies offlane. Sit in lane and farm, don't roam, this way he can't do jack with his mines. The don't roam part is very important, Techies is really good against roaming but if you just support your lane with obs/sentries and zone him he can't do anything. Just pick late game heroes and play some ricing doto, and you win. Techies is only truly viable as a counterpusher in ricing lineups so if your lineup is more late game/ricing oriented than the enemy you win xD

So yeah either stack Necronomicons and push, or just outfarm them because you're playing 5 v 4.

Other alternative : pick Ogre Magi. With 7 starting armor and almost broken starting HP, he always survives mines (which deal physical damage).

Or just play support Zeus. Tranquil Boots, Soul Ring, spam lighting everywhere, ez safe lane ez mines.

When I hate a hero I always try to imagine the best way of screwing them so hard that they ragequit... Dooming them every time is the best example.

Well maybe that's one reason to hate Techies, I don't like the "outricing" strategy that much, but it does work.

Was that bit with the Micheal Bay intentional?

You forget that Techies have arguably the worst team fight presence in the game (I can't even think of anyone who could even contest that title). Also, a nice little thing to do to counter their mines are... 5 MAN LEVEL 3 Necronomicons! Seriously, just pop your necrobook and go minesweeping, plus necrobook is the best pushing item in the game ( Techies can't do a thing against 5 man pushes). Get Necrobooks on Nature's Prophet and Lycan since they can push faster than Techies can set up mines, or even on Visage since the mines can't be triggered by his familiars and he's already a solid pushing/ganking hero.

Stasis Trap... Yeah it's annoying yet it is very easy to deal to with. The reason is that unlike Black Hole, Stasis Trap can be blocked with Black King Bar whereas Black Hole cannot be blocked (that, and Black Hole also does damage, and is actually useful in teamfights, whereas Techies can't do anything of that sort).

And about Suicide Squad, Attack!, the cooldown at max level is 2 and a half minutes, so it's not going to be available for every time you and team decide to gank Techies (that and by properly timing your suns and disables, you can still gank Techies without having to worry about the explosions, or just combo Ancient Seal with Finger of Death or any other burst nukes).

So, yes I agree Techies could be considered the One Direction, Honey Boo Boo, or even the Reply Girl of DOTA 2 (Heck, even the people living in the apartment room next to me might be the Techies). But, unlike real cancer, there is indeed a cure Techieitis, take two milligrams of Sentry Wards before each match and if any symptoms rise again, contact your doctor to discuss further treatment options.

For those who don't consider Techies to be cancerous at all, I have one question for you.

I myself love playing Techies in pubs because I love explosions. So yeah, I will keep playing them, but they are not cancer.

If there is a cancer hero in this game, it is Slark Jesus Christ that ugly fish. Given the slightest oportunity he will win the game no matter what, while a Techies might be annoying but can't win a game by himself, specially against Zeus or multiple supports.

Another pretty annoying hero is Bristleback "uh yeah buy magic sticks"

You can't kite Lycan

Bloodseeker is a terrific counter, since Soul Ring early on will have you hanging on low hp and detecting you. You are slow enough to be caught in Blood Rite, and he can silence your Suicide Squad Attack. Beastmaster is mean too, you can scout him and make the boar clean the minefield.

Cancer tactics: Picking Slark, cutting lanes with Axe, Tinker maxing March of the Machines.